3DD!3

A relaxing ride for a good mood. Guy Ritchie watched Quentin Tarantino's Inglorious Basterds and thought he could make something cool like that too. Well, it's not that good, but it's fun to watch. A stylish wartime flick with a western score, a great Henry Cavill and Alan Ritchson as the ultimate killing machine; it doesn't get boring and is shot so casually that it lacks any fatality or major tension. The best action falls in the first half of the film, where they liberate Apple. The passages without the main party are not much fun even though Eiza González is very good at it. This should have gone to the cinema, the ending is at night and the spurting blood is hard to see.

An adventure fairytale with decent production design but terrible visual effects, and infamous for Arnold Schwarzenegger's fight with Jackie Chan. Aside from the much-publicized fight in the trailers, there's not much of either Jackie or Arnold, and the story is about everything but them. A princess, a witch, a dragon, an iron-masked tsar, and a cartographer of sorts meet on the Great Wall of China and then have a pow-wow. The fight between the princess and the fake princess is terribly messy, yes because they look exactly the same... And the wicked minions seem to have fallen out of the Big Trouble in Little China. Average, with one bonus star for that fight.

A delightful B-movie with a demented script by Kurt Wimmer, with extreme and bloody action. I don't understand who consulted and explained to the filmmakers the general workings of computers, how phishing takes place, what the lairs look like, where the millions disappear from the retirement accounts of American pensioners, but the result presented here is so over the top that I suspect Wimmer and David Ayer of making a satire of sorts. And Jason Statham is something of a force of nature. A hurricane that takes out the amoral call center fuckers, while looking like my dad watching cycling on TV. Ayer and Gabriel Beristain keep the visuals in check, and that's what makes the film look great. Josh Hutcherson, unfortunately, is not ugly enough as the vile perpetrator of all evil. He tries, but you just don't believe the self-absorbed prick. Jeremy Irons has virtually nothing to work with. And that security guard at the end, that's something. But what I enjoyed the most was the role of the FBI agent, a stay-at-home dad who figures out how to get out of work and all of Statham's destruction, only to have his stupid partner (Emmy Raver-Lampman) drag him into the hardest shit, only to change her mind about the whole thing. Maybe it's not even a B, it's a C. It's terribly bad, but I had a royal good time in places. Guilty pleasure? To bee or not to be?